That day I was very stressed. My head was throbbing. I didn't know what to do. My exams were just a week away. I had topped not only in my college but in the entire university in the first year of my course. I enjoyed all the adulation, which I had never experienced till then. My topping in the first year had opened the doors of many extra-curricular and co-curricular activities as well.
The cherry, chocolate sauce and every thing that was good on the cake, was that I excelled in these extra-curricular and co-curricular activities as well. Here too I created records. I won inter-university prizes. Everywhere all – the students, teachers and even outsiders talked only about me. What more an eighteen years old could have asked for?
The whole year passed in receiving all those prizes. Now my second year examination was staring at me point blank with its big mouth gaping. I had done everything in that year – yes everything apart from studies. Unfortunately none of my extra or co-curricular activities were going to help me when it came to examination. I wondered how good it would have been if the exams were in the form of extra-curricular or for that matter even co-curricular activities. After all exams were all about cramming and bookish knowledge. While the extra and co-curricular activities trained us for the real world outside – whether professional or personal.
But all this mental consolation was not going to help me out when I hadn't studied at all. In my first year I had topped the university with record breaking marks. Now the pressure was mounting up on me. Leave getting that score, I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to even scrap through the examinations.
"Take a drop" Told a friend of mine with whom I had shared my plight.
"What do you mean?" I asked me.
"Don't appear for the examination this year. Study well and appear next year." I was very happy with the solution which he had offered. All my nerves were relaxed in a moment.
That day when I returned home I told my mother about my decision. She was calm. She did not speak a word until the day of the examination arrived. I was merrily singing a song as I was determined that I was not going to write the exams.
“Go and appear for your exams.” She told me.
“I will appear next year.” I replied carelessly.
“No. Go and appear right now.” She said with a firm voice.
“But I have not studied.”
“Doesn’t matter go and write whatever you know.”
“I will f.... fail.” The word fail took too long to drop from my mouth.
“You wont. I trust your abilities.”
Her trust added to the pressure which I was carrying for the examination. We discussed. She never raised her voice. But she didn’t budge from coaxing me to write the exams. Having no option left I trudged to the exam hall. I had not studied. Still I scribbled answers to the questions. I wrote all the papers. Finally the ordeal was over.
After two months it was the time for declaration of the results. The monster of fear of failure resurfaced. I was unable to sleep for the whole night. I was contemplating as to what should I do in case I failed. I zeroed on a few jobs which I would take up if I failed.
The results were declared. To my great surprise, I had passed with fifty-five percent marks. Now that was not the score you could expect from an erst-while university topper. But for me the fact that I hadn’t failed was enough. The next year, which was final year of my college, I studied since the beginning and struck a balance between my studies and extra and co-curricular activities. No wonders I again topped in the university.
I thank my mother for giving me #SachchiAdvice. I thank God for not listening to that well-wisher adviser who had asked me to take a drop. Had I listened to him, I would have wasted a valuable year of my student life.