Anil
Goel's Exit Point could have been a blockbuster. Anil had all the key
elements of a thriller set in the cyberspace that too of 2016. So the
protagonist Alok has to uncover the murder of a young girl called
Megan. Apparently she was chatting with another girl by name Ishshah
on a social networking site called Xnet (sort of facebook) founded by
one Mark Eisenberg. Plus there is an online suicide pact between two
strangers. There is Adam, Eve and even the eastern Mahasamadhi. In
an attempt to make the novel success, Anil has stuffed the book with
all that he could. So we have foreign accounts like that of Swiss,
Quantum computers, a cop with a past, two computer prodigies,
noosphere, gunfire in an American School. The plot travels across the
globe – Australia, India, China, Hong Kong, London and America.
There
is nothing wrong incorporating all these elements. However, they
should have been incorporated in the right amount and at the right
places. In other words the book required better editing job. Anil has
spent considerable ink in thanking his editor for making the novel
readable. However, it is only because of poor editing that the book
with brilliant ideas drags most of the times, takes time to built
characters, wastes pages in unnecessary descriptions, looses the
murder and suicide plot behind Mark and gives unnecessary importance
to characters like Dharamsingh, Pratigya and Yunusbhai, who have
very little to do with the story. The concept of deadswitch whereby a
person can record his last moments and send it to the person with
whom he wished to share it is definitely interesting. I wish it would
have been used a little more instead of just touch and go.
The
story sounds very contemporary. I wondered why it was set in the year
2016. The setting in the year 2016 is not too distant a future. So it
does not make a very big difference.
The
use of incorrect Hindi and Marathi sentences is another drawback of
the book. So What Happened is written in Hindi as Kya ho gaga.
Don't trouble sir too much, okay becomes Sahib la
traas nako diyu ka.
It would have been better if the dialogues were kept in English
instead of wrong usage of Hindi and Marathi languages. Similarly
there are mistakes with regard to English as well. In my opinion the
sentence “He fell down as an urchin in a tattered yellow flock
flew past him,” is incorrect. I think what the writer meant was a
frock and not flock. Similarly lines like I'll take your leave for a
bit too don't sound good. At many places a single sentence is
abruptly broken to form another paragraph. The length of the novel
(more than 500 pages) works against it. The novel could have
certainly been a racy thriller if it would have been trimmed down by
some pages.
Some
chapters carry locations like London St. Paul Cathedral and also
month and year, while some chapters don't carry any. The places don't
have a role in the story. So even if St. Paul Cathedral had become a
Jama Masjid, it would not have any impact on the story. There is no
flipflop of years. The story proceeds in a chronological manner. So
mentioning of year and location is certainly misguiding.
I
will definitely give full marks to Anil for his conceptualization. It
is simply brilliant. He should be congratulated for attempting a
Herculean task. That he just scrapes through it is another story. I
wish the novel could have been better edited. It definitely offers
something new. Bad editing makes the novel drag. I mourn the death
of a fantastic novel in its womb, for it did not find a trained
midwife to make its delivery in the world of literature smooth. But
Anil you have the potential and we look forward for your next novel.
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